GOODELL FAMILY LETTERS- #12
 

Anson to his Parents

Newbern, N. Carolina
 Sunday, April 6 [1862]
Direct as usual Co. D 25 Mass V
Burnside Division Via Fortress Monroe

Dear Father & Mother

            Don’t direct to Roanoke or Newbern for me may be somewhere else and the letter miscarried. I t is a lovely Sabbath day, warm as July not a breath stirs the balmy air. The birds are singing delightfully in the blossoming trees.

            I had a few spare moments after church service which I cannot better occupy than in answering your good long and very welcome letter of the 23^rd which came to hand Friday with a Boston Journal from you, three or four papers from Bro. Abbott for which I was very grateful. Those eight postage stamps were just in time and very thankfully received as I had but one left and no way of getting more. I would like to have you keep account of all these favors which sometime I will endeavor to repay. Our clothes wear well but are getting uncomfortably warm so that we will not need underclothes much longer. Edwin’s boots are good yet – but mine are cracked off at the sole but I drew a pair of shoes at Roanoke where we had a fresh supply of clothing – so that I get along well without my boots – and as weather is growing warm shoes will be more comfortable.

            We have not been paid since leaving Annapolis more than three month since but expect it everyday. Some of our paymasters are here but those having the money have not arrived. What opportunities we shall have of sending money home I don’t know as yet.

            I wrote to Waldo soon after the battle at Fort Thompson giving a description of it and directed to South Brookfield, however it was nothing valuable so that it matters not if he does not get it. We have written him two letters but get no answer. I was informed in a letter from Albert that he met Waldo in Worcester on his way to Dudley in search of a better job. Please tell us here he is if you know. We are very glad that Father and Charlie are so well but sad that Mother’s health is so poor. Wish Mother you could renew your youth and be free fro suffering. I thought the absence of two from the family would decrease your work, that your health would be better but you are bound to be at work so you find something to do all the time. I have thought many times of the many evenings I have found you at work 9, 10, and 11 at the molding board or sprinkling clothes for the morrows ironing, or very patiently at work over our fine clothes to suit her lazy boys – labors poorly requited! But dear Mother we didn’t know then how highly favored we were in the enjoyment of homes comforts and the kind sympathy of warm hearted friends. I fear, Mother, that dread suspense, that anxiety for our safety, of which you speak does much to undermine your health, feeble at best. Those at home are much more excited over a battle than we who see all its horrors. You get the worst phase of it in the shape of distorted pictures and dashing displays of rhetoric from big reporters who are anxious to create a sensation. I have not seen a picture that has done justice to either of our engagements – here or at Roanoke – and as to their descriptions you who would know nothing of the circumstances could guess nearer than some of them write so that by then you are kept constantly in a blaze of excitement and terrible suspense while we are pleasantly ensconced in secesh quarters either in flush of victory or pleasant anticipation of fresh conquest. I wish you could be here and just see for yourself the coolness and cheers which the men receive the orders from the Gen’s. and take up their line of march for a new point. I think you would not allow yourselves to get so very much excited. Probably another battle is not ten days distant yet we write to home and friends with as little anxiety as though by the firesides of our own homes. You may think this strange yet it is a fact.

            Being in the Army has learned me one thing if it has made me a fool in every other respect – that is not to be anxious for the future. When we left Worcester I gave my destiny into the hands of Providence and have not seen the time since I would take it back. My faith in God’s power to save was never stronger nor my confidence in his wisdom.

            He knoweth what is best and will do nothing that will not be for our present and eternal well-being.

            If we had not the promise that grace would be sufficient whatever the circumstances I should be led to doubt the genuineness of that serene peace which so often fills my soul to overflowing with the joys of Salvation – how sweet that word! What joy it brings to the believers heart. O how important to him who knows not how soon the hour may come that will call him to the field of strife and thence usher him without a moment’s warning before the Burning Throne. Think you at such time I would sell my hope in Christ for the honors of time! Ah! No.

            I have the glorious assurance, thank Heaven  - that Death would be but the gate to joys lasting as Eternity and to a world -                        

                                    “Where Sickness, sorrow, pain or Death are felt and feared no more” Why need you be anxious for us? Cannot God take care of us? Place the future with all its untried scenes in His hands and all will be well. But why a I writing this to you who are well experienced in God’s dealings and know far better than we the strength of His promises.

            Pardon my assuming to council you, my parents who are growing grey in Christian experience while I am a mere child yet –

            You will know the efficacy of earnest prevailing prayer.

            O wouldn’t I love to join the dear Dudley brethren in their prayers tonight in the old Vestry where I have so often been blest in the discharge of duty – but for the present this is my lot – hoe long God only knows but thank the Lord time has a limit and if we survive the campaign I’ll sometimes meet them. Tell the brethren Father, that I’m trying to be a Christian though at times it is against fearful odds – however I have through grace come off victor thus far.

            We are all well and in fine spirits. It is getting quite warm so that we begin to sweat quite freely. We have a fine place to wash and bathe as the river flows just back of our quarters. living first rate for soldiers, have milk in our coffee nice a day, doughnuts occasionally, Oysters etc. We have now a first rate cook but I must now close.

                                                                        Goodnight, yours dutifully

                                                                        Anson and Edwin

[Written along the sides]

We are guarding the city every other night.

Tell uncle Waldo[1] I should be very happy to receive a letter from him.

I shall write Bro Abbott in a day or two – will you see that the letter is forwarded to him if it should be to late.

Love to Charles also to Uncle Waldo’s family Aunt Becca, Hezzie, George, John.[2]

Love to Waldo.